Thursday, December 11, 2008

Happy Christmas Party...Complete with Open Bars, Drag Queen Sing-A-Longs, and Ex Boyfriends

Ok, I'm back...its been a while but I'm here and ready to continue my judgement of the world!

So Tuesday of this week I and my bestfriend in the entire world, whom I'll call Straight Lady, were invited to JR's Christmas Party that was invite only. We were super excited for the evening and got dressed up and met up with friends accordingly. I was not particularly looking forward to the initial first eye-contact between my ex and I as this would be the first time I saw him after I drunkenly professed my feelings for him via facebook. I was pretty nervous upon entering the bar and sure enough we saw each other but I quickly looked away and focused on my beverage.

All in all the evening was awesome. There was an open bar which I didn't realize at first and lots of food that had been brought over to feed hungry bellies. It was interesting to see the variety of people there. I mean, this is the cream of the crop JR's patrons. Some people dressed up and others in casual attire. I stayed in my corner for most of the evening with Straight Lady and my other good friend, Golf Cap. The bartenders were in ties and looking sharp as well. The only person I was offended upon looking at him was an old man dressed in what only can be described as a Juan Valdez poncho and looked like he was straight off a floating door from a place that people apparently never shower. The man was shoveling food from his plate to his mouth via a pita chip and I almost threw up in my mouth twice. Huge Tranny and one that needs to learn how to eat in public without looking like a homeless person ravaging over a week old sandwhich from the dumpster where his cardboard box home is currently located. BYE!

There was one person, in particular, who kept oogling my goodies all evening. Normally I would be offended as most of the attention I get is from older men who don't know when its quitting time for shopping at Abercrombie and start looking for more age appropriate clothing from, say, Macy's. Straight Lady did not agree with my assessment of his level of cuteness but I was persistant and decided to continue to make eye contact back.

Now, let it be known, that I do not approach people. I'm under the philosophy that if you are going to be worth my time you'll come to me. I know that's way egotistical but I'm a shy person when it comes to that sort of stuff and I don't like making the first move as it could open myself up to vulnerability and I don't like that! After many, many looks back and forth Straight Lady told me to go to the bathroom and that she would rope him in (thanks Straight Lady). So I did and it worked like a charm. I was then introduced to Rescue Me Joe. He's my age and works as a paramedic/firefighter for McLean, Va. Ten hot points automatically. He has a little bit of a lisp which I found endearing and all told we hit it off smartly. (We have a date for Saturday which I'm excited for!)

The whole time this was taking place my ex was standing just feet away and witness to the whole exchange which made the night even sweeter. Not only had I found a good looking guy who was all over me but it sent a message to the Ex that I can and am doing better than you. I know this is wrong to think but I can't help it. And what made the whole night even better is that I saw him canoodling with some SF blonde guy at the end of the evening. Way to aim high kiddo, glad you gave this up for something like that...drunk or not!

I guess the point of this story is that, two hours before I didn't think I would ever be able to do better than the Ex. He meant a lot to me and still does but for the first time since the breakup I felt excited and I still have butterflies when I think about my upcoming date with Joe. I know I may be putting a lot of expectations on the situation and I'm trying to focus on the fact that A. I don't know how well he kisses B. We haven't had sex so I'm not sure how that works in the picture and C. I don't know him!!! The point, my friends, is that I finally have butterflies for someone other than the Ex and proves to myself that I'm finally, after all this damn time, ready to move on. I have met someone that puts a smile on my face and even if it doesn't work out because A, B, and C turn out to be awful, it doesn't matter. I haven't a desire to be that guy who's still pining over the Ex when clearly the Ex has moved on to bigger and fatter people! Its like I have finally exhaled.

So, my reccomendations for those who are still stuck in the rut of a past relationship is...continue to pine and be pathtic...because when the time comes that you finally realize how over it you actually are, the feeling is amazing. We all deserve better than the Ex and when your day finally comes you're going to be on happy me, its been a long 6 months coming!


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